When we meet “normal” / “regular” people, we often have a set of basic introductory questions, “What’s your name?” Etc.

Actually, it’s a little sensitive, because we want to ask questions to show we actually care that we are meeting the person, but we don’t want to ask too many questions or ask questions that are inappropriate or “too personal” for the first meeting.

I have spent many years in temples and spiritual communities. Almost without exception, when people meet in those communities the questions go like this, “What is your name? Who is your guru? Oh, doesn’t he…?”

I never liked it.

“HIDE!”

Hari-bhakti-vilāsa [a manual of proper conduct for Gauḍīya Vaiṣṇava practitioners, written by a founder of the community, Sanātana Gosvāmi] quotes Sammohana-Tantra:

गोपयेद्देवतामिषटां। गोपयेद्गुरुमात्मनः।
गोपयेच्चनिजंमन्त्रं। गोपयेन्निजमालिकाम्।

gopayed devatām iṣṭāṁ
gopayed gurum ātmanaḥ
gopayec ca nijaṁ mantraṁ
gopayen nija-mālikām

“Hide your beloved deity. Hide your guru.
Hide your mantra. Hide your mālā.”

It must certainly come as a shock to read this, at least for people in the communities I have been lucky enough to be a part of. Most of us walk around in public with our mālā, chanting our mantra out loud and even inviting others to chant it, and the first thing we do on meeting one another is ask “Hi! Who is your guru?” and then start discussing the mantras and divinities that guru “promotes.”

I think Sanātana Gosvāmi would say…

We.

Should.

Not be doing that.

Look at the title of the book he is quoting. “Sammohana Tantra.” It is a book about, well, we might call it “witchcraft” – and how to protect oneself from it. The basic idea behind witchcraft is that the more someone knows about you, the more control and power they can have over you. This is true on all levels, “practical” and “mystical.”

If someone knows something unimportant about you, it doesn’t make a difference. For example, I ate french fries last night. I really don’t care if anyone knows that. I cannot be blackmailed by that information. I will not be hurt or devastated if someone lambasts me about the evils of fried foods. But, if I were to reveal something very important to me, it would be a different story altogether.

In our extroverted, social-media culture, we tend to think the more important something is, the more we should “share.” This isn’t true, and its part of the reason we have so little control over our moods and our happiness.

Four things are extremely important to a spiritual practitioner:

deva, guru, mantra, māla

Māla

Māla refers to the strand of sacred beads we use to count mantra, and it also refers to strands of flowers, beads, and gems we can wear as necklaces, etc. Telling us, “hide your māla!” means two things: (1) hide your beads, (2) hide your necklaces.

The reason for both is the same: pride. The progress of any form of yoga or learning is severely hindered by arrogance. Showing off flower garlands, necklaces, and sādhana beads is a way of saying, “Look at me!” Sādhana beads are the worst of the three, because showing them directly pollutes our very practice itself with arrogance. “Look how assiduously I practice. Am I not great?”

Practice humbly and in private.

Don’t show off.

“Hide your māla” also implies, “don’t discuss your spiritual practices,” which brings up the next topic…

Mantra

Mantra is the primary tool for most spiritual practices, because it is made of words and therefore conveys awareness and knowledge – the most essential medicine for spiritual recovery and progress.

Why should we hide it?

Mantra is consciousness-medicine. Medicine works on the inside. When we have a headache we don’t distribute aspirin to our neighbors, we swallow it. When we get a burn, do we put creme on our neighbors skin?

If we share our mantra publicly, it becomes a commodity. Is that respectful or disrespectful to the mantra? Once it is a commodity, it goes onto a shelf in a store, and shoppers compare it to other mantra. Competing brands will criticize it. Uneducated shoppers and salespeople will yap about it, clouding up our heart and mind with their, frankly, stupid ideas of what it means, does, etc.

The only person who should really be speaking about our mantra, is the one who gave it to us…

Guru

Guru is the personal agent through whom the Veda enters our being. Thus, the Guru’s fundamental role is to select appropriate manta from the Veda and teach the student how to realize what it means.

Why should we hide our guru?

When people ask, “who is your guru” if you could freeze frame and peel off all the fanciness from their question and get down to the real subconscious motivation, it would sound a lot like, “Can my dad can beat up your dad?” and “Is my dad friends or enemies with your dad?” Do you really want to get involved with that?

If we make the mistake of revealing who our guru is, we create a new commodity to go on “the shelf,” probably right next to our mantra. My guru and I are now ready to be assessed by shoppers and merchants. Deep down, people are extremely competitive and jealous, so it is not likely the assessment will be sincerely positive. And if it superficially is, we are probably being welcomed to the sordid world of strategists and flatterers.

Deva

Deva means “divinity.” The dynamic here is the same as with guru and mantra. “My god can beat up your god, so you should submit to me as I magnanimously bless you with introduction to my infinitely awesome god.“

Make a space on that commodity shelf, right next to my mantra and my guru. We have a new product: my God!!! Let the competition tremble, and let the shoppers and salespeople renew and refresh their incessant and ever-flowing yap-fest!

BTW, Who is Your Guru?

After reading this, will we stop asking and answering stuff like, “Oh hi! Nice to meet you. Who is your guru? Oh, isn’t he a worshipper of Durga, who chants the Nārāyaṇī mantra on 8-face Rudrākṣa māla???”?

Most of us won’t stop because we are (to be frank) dumb and lazy.

We are too dumb to figure individuals and their concepts out for ourselves, and too lazy to explain who we are and what we are in situationally appropriate and individualized ways.

Honestly, people like us are not worth trying to socialize with anyway. =)